What you need to know about bullies is that it doesn’t matter what you do, they will still attack you. So you might as well let your geek flag fly.
Their goal is rarely against a particular group of people (though they might justify their behavior that way). The goal is social exclusion and power. Until and unless we deal with that, as the goal, we will fail to get it to stop.
Getting the best of a bully doesn’t mean adopting their tactics. It means being strategic and allowing the bully to show off how much of a jerk they really are. …
Gaslighters are only able to do what they do if they have plausible deniability. By documenting everything, you deny them plausible deniability. Gaslighters tend to wilt under the glare of thorough documentation and follow up.