We humans are instinctively programmed to want to fit in. When someone marks us as others, our immediate instinct is to basically beg to get back into the “group.” This almost never works and will usually result in a repeated pattern of bullying marking you as – out.
So how to combat this? Well – it’s about resisting peer pressure and group think and purging yourself of the need to fit in. IF fitting in means being bullied. People will learn they can pressure you to do stupid or dangerous things – if they threaten to kick you out of the group. That – is – a – recipe – for -disaster. It’s best not to give in to peer pressure.
First – realize that your instincts are normal. That doesn’t mean you have to act on it give in. It’s just peer pressure. Your desire to fit in – is fine, but.. it’s ok to be your own person too.
One of the ways my friends and I dealt with peer pressure is to expose the person exerting pressure – as the one at fault. We did this by pointing at them and yelling – “Peer Pressure!!!!” At the top of our voices. It didn’t stop peer pressure attempts, but it made it totally ok to call it out and make the person attempting the pressure look bad and take the pressure of the person being bullied.
Does it take courage to do this? Of course it does. Is it super fun to do? Yes!!!!! Especially since the person who is being called out will have zero idea how to respond to your allegation.
Warning – don’t use this to bully the bully. Just – use it as a defensive weapon only.