Don’t Hate the Hater and Don’t Bully the Bully

If someone is behaving badly, you don’t have to join them. Hate is a very difficult emotion to feel and it’s a very difficult emotion to carry. If you want to be happy in life, and I hope you do, learn how to deal with difficult people, with love, joy and compassion. It will drive the haters mad.

Bullying tip #45: Why and how compassion makes bullies stop.

Bullies aren’t happy people. Well, they may be, but what they are doing is very negative. When people are mean, it is very hard to not feel bad. In fact, it is normal to feel bad.

But, whoever you are and however odd and weird you are, understand this, weird is wonderful. Being interesting, is an advantage in life, so own it.

Everyone is wonderfully weird. The joy of Humanism is that it encourages us to to view other people through a lens of joy and love and yes, compassion. Even the people who are being mean.

It is normal to get mad when someone makes us feel bad. as bullies do. When you find yourself feeling mad, what I want you to do is acknowledge that you are mad, acknowledge that it is ok to be mad and then … let it go and consciously choose to think a pleasant thought about yourself. They are wrong about you. You are wonderful.

Once you are feeling self righteous, I want to you try and extend your love for self to love for the other person. All humans hurt. Including bullies. Try and see them through this lens, they are hurting. They tried to make you hurt like them, and that’s really sad.

Once you are in this frame of mind, now you can think of how you want to respond to them. By this point, you probably won’t. You will just want to walk away with your head held high thinking how sorry you feel for them.

That’s what works to stop bullying. That’s it. Love & compassion, for yourself and for others.

Is this easy to do? Nope. It takes practice. A lot of practice. But as you practice it, you will find it gets easier and that you are starting to feel better. And the better you feel about yourself, the less fun you are to bully.

Don’t bully the bully. They have enough problems. Try compassion instead.