If your child is being bullied at school, it’s essential to take action to protect their well-being and ensure that the school takes the issue seriously. But what can you do if you feel like your child’s school isn’t doing enough to address bullying? In this blog post, we’ll provide you with some tips and resources to help you get your child’s school to deal with bullying effectively.
The first thing to know is that schools aren’t really prepared to deal with bullying effectively. Stopping bullying is a process that takes time and schools are designed to deal with problems one off. They aren’t organized to track patterns of behavior. Also, most don’t know the science of what is required to get bullying to stop.
If your child is being bullied at school please watch this free video on “How to Talk to Your Child’s School About Bullying” – https://bullyvaccineproject.com/how-to-talk-to-your-childs-school-so-they-will-actually-listen-and-help/
Here are some key tips for parents who are trying to address bullying with their children’s school.
- Be prepared: Educate yourself about bullying, its effects, and how it can be addressed using behavioral science. All the bullying resources on this website are free, no sign up required. Learn what science says works to make it stop. Here is a quick primer: https://bullyvaccineproject.com/why-bullies-bully-how-to-stop-them-using-science/
- Document everything: Bullying is a pattern of behavior that serves no legitimate purpose except to annoy the target. To prove that pattern, you need to keep a record of all incidents of bullying, including the date, time, location, what happened, where it happened and who may have witnessed it. You can find a sample documentation log here: https://bullyvaccineproject.com/courses/downloads/
- Use the right words: Don’t call it bullying. Be specific about what exactly happened. Was your child pushed? Were they called names? Use clear, specific language when discussing bullying with school officials. Be assertive but not aggressive, and focus on the specific things happening. It is also helpful if you express concern for the child who is acting out inappropriately. Bullying is often masking an underlying problem and any child who is bullying, needs an intervention for their own sake.
- Learn how to navigate the system: Familiarize yourself with the school’s policies and procedures for addressing bullying, and find out who you need to talk to if you have concerns.
- Know who’s who in the school: Identify the key people in the school who can help you, such as the principal, school counselor, or anti-bullying coordinator. This free video lesson can help you identify who in your child’s school can be the most help. Hint: It’s often the school counselor. They have the ability to go into a classroom and observe the dynamic and can see things the teacher can’t. https://bullyvaccineproject.com/how-to-talk-to-your-childs-school-so-they-will-actually-listen-and-help/
- Understand what to expect: Find out what steps the school will take to address the bullying, and what support is available for your child. The main thing to understand is that there is no magic wand anyone can wave that will make the problem magically stop. Bullying is a behavior. To stop it requires strategic intervention over time. Everyone has a role to play including your child. The good news is teaching your child how to respond effectively will empower them. But it’s important to be honest with them so that they don’t give up. This website has lots of free bullying resources to help you teach your child the science of how to stop bullying and what they should expect when they use these techniques. I have 53 short video lessons designed for kids – https://bullyvaccineproject.com/53bullyingtips/
- Develop and implement your strategy: Use the information you’ve gathered from this website to develop a plan for addressing the bullying, and work with the school to implement it. You should view the toolkit videos so you, as the parent, fully understand the science of what you need to teach your child: https://bullyvaccineproject.com/toolkitoverview/
Dealing with school bullying can be a difficult and emotional process for both parents and children. But with the right information, resources, and support, you can help your child feel safe and empowered in their school environment. Use these tips and resources to get your child’s school to deal with bullying effectively and promote a positive and inclusive school culture.