Sometimes people surprise you

Don’t let your fears keep you from finding friends.

It is very easy to demonize people. We let our fears impact how we feel about others. And when we fear people – we assume they are bad or evil – because – they are making us afraid.

But that’s our thoughts and our thinking. It’s entirely possible that – they are nice – and you just don’t know it.

One of my best friends – didn’t like me when she first met me. She readily admits this. She thought I was a snobby person and so – she treated me as if I was snobby. She felt I was a threat.

The reality was – I was not a threat to her. And I didn’t know she didn’t like me so I pursued a friendship with her – because – she’s super cool.

It wasn’t until we were stuck together in the back seat of a tiny car on a road trip with mutual friends that she was forced to get to know me. That’s when she realized – we both have a rather wicked but kind sense of humor.

In short, I wasn’t at all who she assumed I was. We have been friends for decades now.

Don’t assume you know who someone is. Don’t assume you know why they are acting the way they are. Give people a chance. Let them surprise you with their kindness.

The reality is – most people are really nice and are insecure and looking for friends. Be open to that.

Now – if they behave badly and bully and demean you – well – respond accordingly – and by accordingly – I mean – don’t respond in kind. Use the behavioral techniques I teach to help you get them to stop while protecting yourself.

One of the reasons compassion is such an important part of the process and metholdology is because- even when people behave badly – it may not be because they dislike you. Often they are responding to other things. And you can help them and help yourself at the same time.

But – your safety does come first. So – learn the skills of how to protect yourself without hurting others.

Get my book and take advantage of all the free lessons I offer.