Bullying is a learned behavior. Bullies bully because it works. Want to make it stop, we have to stop letting them get away with it.
I have been teaching people how to stop bullying for a few years now. To be honest, I’m kind of tired of parents giving me excuses about why they aren’t doing anything to make it stop.
Look, I get it, your kid is the victim. It’s the other kid who needs to change and the other parents who should be forcing their kid to change and the schools should be doing something about this anyway. But clearly – that’s not happening. And you shouldn’t be allowing your kid to be bullied because you think someone else should make it stop.
The truth is it doesn’t matter why the other kid is bullying. And you blaming the other kid’s parents for it isn’t fixing the problem. Your kid needs to learn what to say and how to say it in order to make their bully stop. This is something you can and should be teaching them!
Teaching your child how to make a bully stop isn’t about telling your child to change. It’s about teaching them the skills they desperately want to learn. Teaching a kid how to stop a bully is empowering. It’s good for your kid and if you do it right, it will help the other child as well by forcing their parents and the teachers to pay attention and intervene. That doesn’t happen magically. You have to make it happen.
To be effective you need to learn how to talk to your child’s school effectively – and yes, I have a free video lesson on that – for people who sign up for the free membership on this website (I require membership so comments are private and secure).
Then, you need to learn what it is your child should be doing and can do to help make their bully stop. Your kid can do this. They may need some encouragement from you to get there, but they can do this. So stop treating your child as a victim and empower them to take this on.
The simple truth is – this is your responsibility as the parent – so learn what you need to know and get on with it.